This is just a short story I wrote. It
was my first attenpt at Xena fanfiction. The story isn’t really connected
to any episode though it is somewhere between "The Bitter Suite" and "Sacrifice".
Xena and Gabrielle are recruited by a hereto unknown god to recover Nike’s
Reef
Part One
As Xena stokes the campfire she turns to look at her companion, lying in her bedroll writing something in her scrolls.
"What are you writing about this time Gabrielle?" asked Xena, with a hint of curiosity.
"Oh, not much. Just stuff." Replied the Bard.
"What stuff? We haven’t done anything interesting for the last week?"
"Ummm, just Stuff. Nothing important."
"Oh, Come on Gabrielle. Can I have a look" Queried Xena, here curiosity piqued.
"You would like that wouldn’t you?"
Xena though for a little while…
"Well Yes I would."
"Well It’s not finished yet"
"In that case" Xena asked, "Can you tell me what it’s about?"
"Well It’s a Fiction piece"
"Really" smiled Xena "Tell me more….."
"Well it’s got you and myself in it and we are …"
Xena drifted away from the conversation, as in a trance.
"Xena, What’s….."
"Shhh"
Xena Rose and crept away as the sound of jingling armor became louder… It didn’t take long before the assailant was nearly at the camp. Xena coiled like a rattlesnake as a figure jogged into the clearing.
Xena sprung towards the figure in the darkness, knocking the unknown assailant to the ground and drawing her sword at the same time…
"Owww, Xena…."
"Joxer! What the hell are you doing here?"
"Lying on the ground by the looks of it" giggled Gabrielle.
"Well, Thank you Xena, I just had this cleaned yester…"
"Get to the point!" said Xena as she cut Joxer off in mid sentence.
"Well I heard that you girls were in town and I thought I would come a visit.."
"Isn’t that sweet" scowled Xena, "you’ve seen us now, be on your way.."
"Oh come on Xena, He can stay can’t he?" queried Gabrielle.
Xena turned and smiled at Gabrielle
"You would like that wouldn’t you?" sneered the warrior
"yea, ha ha, Very funny"
"Umm, Am I missing something here". said Joxer as he rose of the ground to stand.
Xena sheathed her sword and began to make her way back to the campfire.
"You can stay if you like, Just keep quiet"
"Sure, No problem, I’ll be as quiet as a mouse, you won’t even know I’m here"
"Yea, Right, I’m…" Xena stopped speaking as she felt a tingle down here spine, which could only mean one thing. She drew here sword and spun around in the direction where she felt the disturbance only to see Joxer.
"Hey, O.K. I’ll shut up" stammered Joxer as he found Xena’s Sword in his face
Xena looked around the clearing as she heard the laughter
"Hehehehehehehe"
Again she turned to face Joxer as his helmet was pulled down over his face
"Hey!" screamed Joxer as his jumped as if the seat of his pants had pulled him up
"Wedgie" shouted the strange voice.
"Show yourself" Shouted Xena as she spun in every direction looking for this mysterious voice’s source.
Then she felt a tap on her right shoulder as the voice said "O.K."
Xena spun to her right to see…. Nothing.
"I’m over her" came the voice from her left.
She turned to her left to see an unfamiliar figure. He was dressed in mostly black but it had a strange quality as the light from the fire reflected in many strange colours off it, purple, green, blue. His face was strange too, almost comical, It was pale with a blackish blue outline around each eye. His hair was quite short and he sported a goatie not unlike the one Ares had. His most distinguishing feature, however, was a pair of wings the sprouted from his back, the same as Cupid’s did but these ones were different. They were much like the wings of a Bat.
"Whoa" exclaimed Joxer as he managed to lift his Helmet up from his face.
"And just who are you supposed to be?" questioned Xena
"Ah, You would be Xena. And this fine lady over here must be Gabrielle." As the stranger waved his arm in the direction of Gabrielle "Auntie speaks so highly of you two."
"Auntie?" Questioned Gabrielle. "Who is your Auntie?"
"And you" the stranger said as he turned to Joxer "Must be Joxer the Mighty. Auntie likes to tell stories about you too. You’re my kinda guy!"
"Really, what kind of stor…" Joxer began
"You haven’t answered my question." Snarled Xena. "Who are you and what do you want"
"Oh sorry, I forget my manners sometimes." Said the stranger. As he reached out his hand to Xena.
"I’m Batwing. Pleased to meet you"
Xena looked at the face of the newcomer and then at his outstretched hand, Never for a moment changing her attacking pose.
"Hmmm, well nice to meet you too Xena" Said Batwing. He then turned to Joxer with his hand still outstretched. "Joxer I presume"
"Umm Yes" said Joxer as he learched forward to shake Batwing’s hand. But at the last second Batwing withdrew his hand and Joxer fell to a heap at his feet.
"Hehehehehehehe, I love it when they fall for that. Literally."
Batwing turn toward Xena again and smiled
"Now can you put that sword away so we can talk" said Batwing as he motioned Xena towards the campfire.
Xena murmured "Very well" and sheathed her sword
"Now isn’t that better" remarked Batwing as he gestured his hand to the heap on the ground that was Joxer. Joxer eyed him with suspicion.
"Hey, it’s for real this time." Said Batwing
Joxer reached up to grab Batwing’s hand and Batwing hoisted him to his feet, then he ambled over to the campfire where he slumped down opposite Xena and with Gabrielle to his left.
"So Who is you Auntie?" asked Gabrielle as Joxer to made his way to the campfire.
"Ah, A lady I know you two love…"
"Yes, go on" said Gabrielle as Xena stared coldly at the newcomer and quietly stoked the fire.
"Aphrodite"
"So, You’re a God" Sneered Xena, "I should has guessed"
"Haha, I would have thought it to be rather obvious"
"So, I suppose that this means that Ares is your Uncle?" asked Gabrielle
"No, I doubt that, His not you Uncle. Is He." Xena got up from her place and walked around the back of Batwing, avoiding his large leather wings.
"No. He isn’t my Uncle."
"But how is that so. If Aphrod…"
Xena cut Gabrielle off by raising her hand. Then addressed Batwing "His your Father. Isn’t He?"
"Yes, he is indeed. Very perceptive of you Xena"
Joxer stare wide eyed at Batwing "Woha"
Batwing turned towards Xena who had now wandered around behind Gabrielle
"Is he always this sharp?" Asked Batwing as he pointed his thumb towards Joxer
"Most of the time" replied Xena
"Anyway, If Ares is your Father then who is your Mother?"
Batwing turned to Gabrielle as she asked the question.
"My Mother is the reason I’m Here" Then he turned to Xena.
"Xena I need your help."
Xena Laughed at Batwing then looked him in the eye.
"And just why do you need my help?"
Well, It appears an old friend of yours stole mummy’s reef. She is most upset. As is Athena."
"Athena, eh" said Xena. "I suppose that means that…"
"That Nike is your Mother" Interjected Gabrielle.
"That Nike is your Mother" Finished Xena and she turned to stare at Gabrielle.
"What?" asked Gabrielle
"Yes well that is all very true but I didn’t come here to discuss my lineage. As I said before I need your help to recover mum’s Reef. She’s really pissed"
"And what atrocities will befall mankind if this reef isn’t found?" queried Gabrielle "Famine, War, Plague?"
"eh?"
"What will happen if we cannot find the Reef is what she is asking" replied Xena to counter Batwing’s puzzlement.
"Oh, nothing really, Mum will just be pissed. And I think she will be quite mad at you Xena."
"And why is that?"
"Well you were the one who gave the thief the Ambrosia"
"Callisto" said Gabrielle and Xena in unison.
"Hey hey, timeout." Interjected Joxer. "Are you telling me that it was you. Xena, Warrior Princess, who turned that mad woman, Callisto, into a goddess"
"It was a regrettable act but one that I would do again for the same reasons"
"What reasons could there be that could justify that??? And you think that I do stupid things!!"
"Hello There, peoples…" Batwing stood up "Could we settle down for a second"
"I can’t understand you Xena!" Joxer said
Batwing turned around to face Joxer and smiled "Oh contraire my dear Joxer. I’m sure you would understand Xena’s reasons." Then he turned to Gabrielle "Am I right Gabrielle?"
Gabrielle turned a bright shade of red and Xena began to laugh. Joxer just looked bewildered.
"Anyway, Will you help me Xena?" asked Batwing.
"Why not" Replied Xena. I’m in the mood for an adventure.
"Excellent. Well I’ll see you three in the morning."
And with that Batwing disappeared with a flash.
"Wow" said Joxer "A god called me Mighty"
"Which is nothing compared with what I will call you if you don’t shut up and go to sleep Joxer" snapped Xena. Than she said to no one in particular "I’m going to bed now"
"Well, tomorrow should be interesting then," said Gabrielle.
Part Two
Xena awoke the next morning with a start, It was already light as she looked around the campsite. She saw Gabrielle still asleep, with a remarkable innocence on her face. Xena wondered how Gabrielle could still look so innocence considering all they had been through. She also wondered how long it had been since she felt so happy and innocence, too long ago to remember… But she had Gabrielle now to keep her in check, make her see the nice side of life, to balance out her darkness. Xena thought back to her time in Chin and to something that Lao Ma said about the Yin and Yang. Yin representing the darkness and Yang representing the light. Gabrielle was most decidedly the Yang to Xena’s Yin.
Xena then turn and saw Joxer, Still asleep but clutching his blanket with a large grin on his face muttering something like "mighty oh yea…you want the mighty Joxer, Gab…"
"Joxer!" screamed Xena
"Ummm, Huhhh, What is it… Xena" Joxer replied groggily as he open his eyes to see the daunting figure or the Warrior Princess towering above him.
"Time to get up."
"What’s going on Xena?" asked Gabrielle as she to arose from her bedroll. "Did you say something?"
"Don’t worry Gabrielle, I was addressing Joxer here. It had nothing to do with you, did it Joxer?"
Joxer looked a little guilty but managed to speak "ummm No, no not at all." He stammered.
"Good Morning All, Are we ready to roll?"
Xena turned around to see Batwing but this wasn’t the same Batwing she had seen the night before. This time he had light brown pants, a brown shirt and a dark leather jacket on. Heavy boots and a Hat with a large brim completed the costume. On his belt hung a large whip.
"What is all this?" questioned Xena
"Just the right gear to go adventuring in" replied Batwing. "You like it?"
"You look like a fool" said Xena as she began to pack her bedroll and disband the camp.
"I think it looks good" Said Gabrielle "Kind of attractive"
"Yea, It will be. Give it a few years, teenage girls will adore this…"
"Yea, I’m sure" grunted Xena as she loaded her gear onto Argo
"I’m just not appreciated in my own time that’s the problem.."
Batwing then turned to address Joxer "Are you coming"
"not yet" Muttered Xena under her breath
"Umm yes sir Mr Batwing.... Sir"
"Batwing will be fine Joxer. Unlike the rest of my family I really don’t mind being addressed by name"
"O.K. Batwing" said Joxer as he packed up.
"Well, Lets get moving shall we?" Xena mounted Argo as Gabrielle threw her own bedroll onto the horse and picked up her staff and the four ventured off.
Part Three
A little way on Gabrielle broke the silence.
"So where are we off to?"
Xena replied "the Temple of Nike, It seems the best place to start"
"Yes, I would have to agree with that" Batwing said as the silence descended again. This time Joxer spoke up.
"SO, Ummm, Batwing. What are the god of exactly?"
Batwing lifted his head to the sky as if looking for something, them turned to face Joxer
"Well, My mother was the Winged God of Victory and my Father was the God of War. What do you think?"
"Well that explains why you have the wings, but why Bat wings?" queried Gabrielle
"Well my dad was God of War, Bat Wings are a little more fearsome than those dove like things mum has."
"Kinda explains the name too." Joxer remarked
"yea, thanks to Auntie again"
"Aphrodite named you? Why was that?" Gabrielle again asking the questions and Xena remained silent.
"Well, as if Ares would come to a birth, but Aphrodite loves that kind of thing, But I know you two know how…"
"Absent," said Gabrielle
"Stupid," said Xena
"Beautiful" chimed Joxer
Batwing looked at Joxer with eyebrows raised
"Blonde" continued Batwing "she is. So she said "Oh Wow, Nike dear he has little batwing thingies, You should call him Batwing" and she did. I can’t believe it. I wanted a cool name like Rioredon or Isalious or Farcamson or Reebok."
"Reebok" said Gabrielle and Xena in confusion
"Hey it will be funny in a few centuries," said Batwing
"Anyway, back to my question.." Joxer began
"Yes, Well by the time I arrived on the scene all the really cool positions had gone so I became the god of…"
"Adventure" postured Gabrielle
"Insanity" remarked Xena
"Celebration?" Joxer ventured.
Batwing stared at Joxer for a while and then spoke "Where do you come up with this stuff?"
Joxer shrugged "War, Victory…"
Batwing let out a bellowing laugh and turned to Joxer again. "hehehehe I can see what Aunt talks about now.. I like you Joxer" as Batwing planted a slap on Joxer’s back that laid him face first into the ground
"No, I’m the God of Mischief"
"Makes sense" said Xena
"And I love a good joke."
"Now I know why you like Joxer" mumbled Xena and then she stared straight ahead, dismounted Argo and walked forward.
"Xena wh…" Gabrielle began
"Man I hate it when he does this.." said Batwing
"Who does what?" Joxer asked
Then Xena spoke "Come on out Ares."
At that moment there was a flash and Ares appeared in front of Xena with here sword pointed directly at his heart
"Ah, nice to see you again Xena" said Ares
"The pleasure is all mine I’m sure" said Xena
"Ah and if it isn’t my Favorite Son"
"Yea Hi Dad how are you…" said Batwing with his eyes looking up to the heavens
"I don’t know what you want Ares but whatever it is I’m sure It cannot be good"
"Now now Xena, Dirty deeds from a daemon sea don’t excite me anymore"
"I’m sure" Xena began
"But this time I’ve got a present for you Xena"
Gabrielle stood between Ares and Xena with her staff poised ready "I don’t think that Xena wants anything you have to give Ares"
"Oh but I think she does"
"And what are you going to give her Dad?" Batwing asked
Ares turned to face Batwing, " Just what you came to…. What the hell are you wearing?"
Batwing looked flushed "ummm This, well its…"
"You’ve been talking to the Fates again haven’t you?" Ares remarked
"So what if I have!"
"What’s wrong with what I gave you!"
And with that Ares waved his hand at Batwing and his Black costume from the night before was restored.
"Oh gee wow Thanks DAD."
"Anyway Xena I have something for you" and Ares reached behind his back and handed Xena Nike’s Reef
Batwing looked towards Ares and stared
"Why didn’t you give it to mum?"
"You know what you mother thinks of me"
"You probably deserve it," said Gabrielle
Xena stared at Ares. "I thought Callisto stole it"
Ares sighed. "Well she did but it’s amazing what a little persuasion can do"
Ares stepped around Gabrielle and began to stroke Xena’s chin
"It’s not to late to change your mind Xena"
Xena took a step back, sword still drawn. Gabrielle was red in the face looking like she was about to explode
"There will never be a you and me Ares!" spat Xena
"Oh well, your loss" said Ares. Then he turned to Batwing "See you around son" and disappeared as suddenly as he had come
"Not if I can help it" Batwing remarked. Then he looked to the sky, then to his feet. Paused for a little while then spoke.
"Umm, well, I guess I’ll be going then."
"Yes, I guess you will" said Xena as he handed Batwing the Reef
"Thanks anyways Xena"
"That’s no problems Batwing" Interjected Gabrielle "We love to help. Don’t we Xena?"
"yea, love to" muttered Xena as she sheathed her sword.
Batwing then turned to Joxer with his hand outstretched
"Well I guess I’ll be seeing you around"
Joxer griped Batwings hand tentatively, and then shook it
"Yea, I guess you will."
Batwing smiled "You can count on it"
And with that he disappeared.
Gabrielle turned to Xena
"What a nice Guy"
"Yea" said Xena "A real gem"
"He wasn’t that bad Xena, Quite agreeable actually"
"For a god" Xena replied
"Not that bad looking either, quite… alluring"
Xena spun to face Gabrielle "What are you talking about!"
Gabrielle giggled "Do I sense a streak of jealousy?"
Xena face Joxer and looked him up and down.
"You still here?"
Joxer looked at his feet "umm well" then looked up at Xena. He had seen that glassy stare before
"Well, I’ll be on my way then shall I?"
Xena turn and said "Yes I guess you will"
As Joxer ran into the distance Xena grabbed Argo reins and began to walk off, Gabrielle ran to catch up
"I was just Kidding Xena"
Xena looked at Gabrielle "You had better have been."
Gabrielle just smiled.
Thanks goes to Universal and Renaissance Pictures for creating Xena
Netgyrl for the screen captures check them out at LaLa's
XWP page
The Caulfields for a little inspiration with Ares
and JJJ for keeping me
sane
Sorry if I offend anybody with this story. It is unintended.